5 Reasons Why Jaleel White Will Win ‘Dancing With the Stars’
The cast of season 14 of ‘Dancing with the Stars’ was just announced, and among the usual boring parade of C-list “stars” (Melissa Gilbert?) and random athletes looking for a career boost (how soon before Donald Driver is dating Kim Kardashian?), there was one fantastic inclusion. The fact that Jaleel White, aka Steve Urkel of ‘Family Matters’ fame, has only just been included on the Vegas-y dance-athon is pretty surprising. If anyone is suited to cutting a rug on TV, it’s the man formerly known as Urkel (and also Stefan Urquelle).
Few ‘Dancing’ contestants have brought so much to the table. Here’s why Jaleel White will be crowned the 2012 ‘Dancing with the Stars’ champ.
1. He invented a dancing robot
Sure, fellow cast member William Levy might be the “Brad Pitt of Mexico.” But did he invent a dancing robot created in his own likeness? Not only did the Urkel-Bot possess sweet moves, it even helped Carl Winslow stop a convenience store robbery in the ‘Family Matters’ episode ‘Robo-Nerd II.’ Why Officer Winslow was partnered with a nerdy robot is another question entirely.
2. He can seduce any lady as “Stefan Urquelle”
Urkel created his smooth alter ego Stefan by altering his DNA with a formula called “Cool Juice.” (‘Family Matters’ got really crazy once Urkel-mania took over.) Of course, Urkel’s lady love Laura had a crush on Stefan, so he later created a Stefan clone so that Laura could date his suave doppelganger. (This is a real thing that happened on network television.) So if Jaleel needs to sway the judges, he could always step into the Stefan Urquelle transformation chamber and seduce Carrie Ann Inaba.
3. He can travel through time
In the season 8 episode ‘A Pirate’s Life for Me,’ Urkel invents a time travel watch and takes Carl back to the 1700s so they can be pirates. (Remember when ‘Family Matters’ was a modest family sitcom like ‘The Cosby Show’? Yeah, that didn’t last long.) So in the event that, say, Gavin DeGraw wins ‘Dancing,’ Jaleel can just travel back to 2003 and prevent ‘I Don’t Want to Be’ from ever being used as the ‘One Tree Hill’ theme song. Poof! Gavin DeGraw is no longer famous. (Watch the insane episode here.)
4. He has his own catchphrase
It’s only a matter of time before Urkel’s famous catchphrase (“Did I do that??”) is trending on Twitter. If ABC is smart, they’ll update the catchphrase for ‘Dancing.’ (“Samba? Did I do that??”) Urkel-mania will come back in full force, with America rallying behind their returning ’90s icon. Sure, Jack Wagner had a hit in 1984 with ‘All I Need.’ But did he have his own breakfast cereal?
5. When the chips are down, he can always ‘Do the Urkel’
Does Sherri Sheperd have her own dance? Nope. But Jaleel White does. Not to be confused with the similar novelty hit ‘Do the Bartman,’ ‘Do the Urkel’ briefly swept the nation during the early ’90s. All he needs is a pair of suspenders to demonstrate his multi-step dance. (Learn how to “Do the Urkel” below.) Hopefully a young Larenz Tate won’t be around to spike his punch.