20 Most Hilarious Lyrics From Chocolate Droppa’s ‘What Now?’ Mixtape
In 2016, it's hard to do much of anything or go anywhere without seeing Kevin Hart, whether it be in movies, commercial spots, guest appearances on sports talk shows or on social media. In an era fixated on building a brand, the diminutive jokester has literally turned himself into a business, one with a stock that seems to be skyrocketing by the day. But just a decade ago, the Philadelphia native was just a rising comic and actor, with his biggest role having been the hip-hop-inspired, critically-panned film, Soul Plane.
Since then, Hart has transformed himself into a true paper soldier, and has been consistently raking in the dough over the past few years, with standout performances in movies like Grudge Match, Ride Along and Get Hard helping him to cross over into the mainstream and expand his fan base. So much so that, this year, he made history by overtaking tenured comedic legend Jerry Seinfeld as the top-earning funny man of 2016, stamping him as one of the most successful and iconic African-American comedians of all time.
But aside from his unforeseen success in the acting and comedic world, Kevin Hart has always showed a desire to fulfill his destiny to become a bona fide rapper, which he's hinted at many times over the years. After threatening to upstage and embarrass his rapper friends countless times, Hart finally made good on his word, inking a deal with Motown Records as his rapping alter ego Chocolate Droppa. The comedic rapper even joined forces with Lil Wayne at the 2016 BET Hip Hop Awards earlier this month to showcase his ability to spit.
To further bolster his cred, the comedian rolled out his debut mixtape, Kevin Hart: What Now? (The Mixtape Presents Chocolate Droppa). Featuring appearances from Quavo and T.I. on "Baller Alert," Trey Songz on "Push It on Me" and additional guests like Akon, Kent Jones, Lil Yachty, 2 Chainz, Big Sean, Chris Brown, the mixtape showcases Chocolate Droppa's hilarious stanzas and infectious energy, as well as Chocolate Droppa's skill as a curator.
After giving the What Now? tape a spin, we've picked out 20 of the most hilarious lines delivered. This is one mixtape that will have you rolling on the floor in laughter.
"You've been alerted! You've been alerted, bitch!/Brrrrp, brrrrp!/Is that a bird or is that one of them chirp alarms?/I don't know which one... Brrrrp, brrrrp!/Cause that could be an alarm too!/It don't have to be a bird.. I'm just lookin' for clarity on my side."
"Uh, Drake beard ain't real, that's a weave/Uh, Drake beard ain't real, that's a weave/Canadian weave, Canadian weave/Did it to yourself, tricks up, my sleeve/Oooh! You thought I wasn't coming for you, Drake?/Well guess what? Nigga you can bet The Six on that!"
"Future, hey! It's time to expose you/Tryna rap all that trap, saying this and that, dap/Shut up and Pitty Pat/Man, fuck that style!/I don't know what you saying, sucka!/I'm sick of it! And I'mma, and take them dog chains off ya neck!/Yeah, them chains too close to ya throat!"
"Lot of you rappers getting butt shots/Y'all getting, butt-shots. Hips all big, butt shots/You think I don't know? Butt shots!/Yeah nigga, walking around, with 22s on yo ass/I'm talking about you 2 Chainz!/I see you nigga! You got butt-shots!/Yeah, I ain't done, uh, yeah"
"'Ye got, cheek implants. 'Ye got, cheek implants/Look at his cheeks, they ain't real!/That nigga got cheek implants!/I'm taking shots at all y'all!/All y'all! I'm expose all y'all for who you are!"
"Ah, ah, they made Droppa get sexy/Just when you thought it couldn't happen it did/But I ain't gonna do it by myself/I brought my guy with me, Mr. Yuh!/Ay bitches, y'all better get a Maxipad and put it on/Cause you about to get wet, let's go, Trigga!"
"Push that thing on me/Jenny Lo' with the booty, sit that ass on me/Don't do it in the mirror girl do it for a G/Girl, you look so good, sit that ass on me, aw/Droppa, yup!
"Yup, it's the dark little big guy/Pushing no salt, no pepper, no french fries/I've been thinking bout your body but the inside/I ain't never hit it but you know that ass been mine"
"Baby, why you talking to them ashy niggas?/And stop drinking it alone, girl, pass the liquor/Got her in the corner, grab her ass, booty, butt/Now tell these motherfuckers they can catch me up in What Now?, yeah"
"Ooohh, I'm on/What? I'm on!/What? I'm a light switch/Flip me on, matter fact, flick me off/Flick me back on, bitch, cuz the light is bright/Chocolate Droppa he shining in this bitch, tonight/What the fuck, what the fuck/What the fuck you want from me?"
"Now I'mma tell you the one thing that you got/You got a variation of a bunch of sounds that we can't really/We can't really break down/I'm just as confused as you are about some of them but the bottom line is we made good music today/Skeet skeet/Brr brr/Chchdee chchdee/That's just a couple that I got"
"From listening to some of the stuff/I will tell you this man/This return is official/And when I say I'm back, you better believe it you hear me/A.k.a. Mr. Music a.k.a. Mr. God damn rap attack/A.k.a. conquer all unless I wanna be conquered tall"
"They say it's cheaper to leave em (cheaper)/Baller alert on my beeper (verrrrp)/Cappin’ is cheaper (cappin’)/Leave it to Beaver (leave it to B)
OG like Kobe (OG)/OG like Jeter (I’m a OG)/I ring your block (run it like who?)/Quavo A Peterson"
"Always reppin', but I'm hardly home/Sean Don Perignon, Don Corleone/Hit the vroom vroom every single time the 'Rari on/Riding around in Malibu tryin' to see a Barbie home/Came up from that one bedroom room, now we on/Hoes bustin' dance moves harder than Omarion"
"Drippin' sauce all over everything/I’m a real king, you a lil something/Boy, don’t make me pull the rings out the vault/I be showin' off and ain’t even gotta talk/Shawty let me hit the hole like Marshall Faulk/Or maybe Barry Sanders/Got some cheerleaders, no love handles"
"We know game, We know game/Y'all thought, y'all thought we was a game, bitch/We know game/Drop that beat!"
"Oh it done came to this/All good things come to an end/You hear me ladies/This good thing has officially come to an end"
"Shhhh! Who gon' ride tonight/It must be you with the tiger stripes/I like them shorts cuz they super short/Call em boy shorts they ain't even got em for boys/Big girl, super thick girl, look taller when you sit girl/Always talking bout you love to fuck/But you hardly take the dick girl"
"Oh naw, I seen her yesterday and she in the mall/With a tall, basketball, player nigga and he started in the Fall/But today she was with me she never called/And tomorrow he gon' be so humbled, naw/He fumbled all, oh no, homie I ain't even worried 'bout your goal/All you niggas stunting man it's getting old"
"Which, one of y'all, coming to the hotel tonight?/They say I like em big I say yea you're right/Stretch marks to the cellulite, stretch marks to the cellulite/Stretch marks to the cellulite"
Stream Chocolate Droppa's What Now? Mixtape